| My Denial says Denial is a way the mind handles the stress and trauma of having a long-lasting disease. Early in my recovery, I attempted to cling to ways I was different from other recovering people. In the program you hear people talk about being terminally unique – at first I didn’t know what they where talking about; but as I learned to listen to others share about their experiences I began to identify and see my own disease and how it works in my own life. At first, I quietly rejoiced when others shared patterns of drinking which I hadn’t experienced or feelings and emotions which I had not felt yet. My denial roots were strong. Even when I could admit I was an alcoholic, I wanted to be different, special “a better alcoholic, addict. While an overwhelming amount of testimony was flowing my way that provided helpful clues to recovery, I waited quietly in my chair to embrace those few traces of evidence which would support my uniqueness. |
| Examples: • People with cancer are always searching for a “magic cure.” • People with heart disease often ignore warning signs and fudge on exercise and diet recommendations. • People with diabetes fail to follow lifestyle changes which promote good health. Chemically dependent people continue to drink and use because they deny they have a problem. At first the denial is just a spontaneous response to the problems which arise from abusing chemicals. However, as more drugs are taken, the brain is physically damaged and the chemically dependent person loses his or her ability to accurately judge and evaluate simple day-to-day situations. Denial says, “I do not have a problem.” Or “My problems are not because of my drinking or using.” Or “things will get better tomorrow or next year.” Or “everyone behaves the way I do.” Or “Maybe my drinking hurts me, but I’m not hurting anyone else, so get off my back.” |
| Facts About Denial: Denial impairs judgment. Denial is a characteristic of the disease. Denial distorts the truth. Denial grows in strength as the disease progresses. Denial cannot be overcome until the drinking and using ends (part of the illness is to deny you are ill). Denial vs. Lying People who lie know what is true, but choose to speak or act falsely. People in denial become confused with what is true and what is false. They are unable to distinguish one from the other. They believe their “lies.” They become deluded. Listening and accepting Left by yourself, you find acts of denial difficult, if not impossible, to discover. You are not aware of your own distortions of the truth. The solution rest with listening to others. Your peers in treatment, your counselor, your family and others will give you important clues to your denial. But you must be willing to listen and to accept what you hear. As you break through one part of your denial, you will recognize other parts more easily. Feel good about these discoveries. There is no reason to feel guilty. Now you will have the knowledge to change. You will have an accurate picture of yourself and the world around you. You are on your way to recovery. Give one example of your denial which you are starting to recognize since entering treatment. How does this recognition make you feel? |
| How Denial grows: Early use brings euphoric feelings Abusive using is understated Patterns of defenses established Lies are told to protect use Adjusting value system Negative consequences are blamed On something/someone else Greater distortion of reality Loss of real feelings Confusion-loss of control CRISIS: CONTINUED USE UNTIL DEATH –HONESTY REALITY RECOVERY How did you use denial in describing: How much you drank and used. How often you drank and used. The problems caused by your use of alcohol and drugs. The harm or hurt you caused others by your behavior. |
| How denial is rooted in non-feeling defenses. Rationalizing “I use because I’m under a lot of pressure.” Intellectualizing “Two ounces of alcohol per day is recommended by health experts.” Blaming “I use because I’m stuck in boring classes all day with boring teachers.” Switching “You seem to be always in a lousy mood. What’s bothering you?” Minimizing “I only get high on special occasions.” Joking “I can stop drinking anytime I please. In fact I stop at least once a week.” Agreeing “Yes I think you’re right. I should cut down on my cocaine use.” Projecting “John really has a problem with booze. I’m glad I’m not like him.” Threatening “I’d like to see you try to make me stop drinking beer with my friends.” Generalizing “We all have a bad habit or two.” |
| Wall of defenses. Here is a wall of defenses Which help support your denial. Check all that apply to you if you don’t know what the words mean, ask for help. List three specific examples from those you checked. Denial Wall of Defenses: ____ Rationalizing ____ Justifying ____ Projecting ____ Blaming, accusing ____ Judging, moralizing ____ Intellectualizing ____ Analyzing ____ Explaining ____ Generalizing ____ Quibbling ____ Debating ____ Arguing ____ Sparring ____ Questioning ____ Switching ____ Denying ____ Smugness ____ Arrogance ____ Minimizing ____ Evading, dodging ____ Defiance ____ Attacking ____ Aggression ____ Withdrawing ____ Silence ____ Verbalizing ____ Shouting ____ Threatening ____ Frowning ____ Glaring, staring ____ Joking ____ Smiling, laughing ____ Threatening ____ Agreeing ____ Complying ____ Hiding |
| Peer to Peer. Selecting two peers going Through treatment with you. Ask each one to help you Complete this page. You wish their assistance in Helping you discover what Defense you use most often Or most effectively. Ask each One separately to write down their opinion on the space provided and then talk to you about their choice. Do not attempt to disagree with their opinion. You may ask for examples so that you can better recognize your use of the defense. Peer One: I think you use… Peer two: I think you use… How do the opinions of your peers make you feel? Relapse Prevention |
| What is Floridians for Recovery (FFR) about and Who are they ? |
| Bill Weaver & Associates, P.A. |
| The ULTIMATE Source for Holistic Health and Transformation for Mind, Body and Spirit |